Memories

I remember thinking it was all a bad dream.

I remember asking my mom to wake me up and then the therapist to.

She said "I can't" and I didn't understand why.

I remember being able to sit up in bed, but falling back down immediately because I lacked the strength to sit up.

I remember for a while I asked my mother if I could eat dinner in my room instead of the dining room with the other patients.

I remember Anthony coming to visit me late one night and standing and talking in the hallway with mommy and rich.

I remember Katie and Amanda and Steve coming to visit me after the prom, and I called Steve "Brian".

I remember hating the diapers.

I remember how I pulled one off one morning because I hated it and my left hand sat in the warm pee, and I didn't comprehend that.

I remember the stupid "commode" as the nice Ella called it.

I remember mean Ella calling me a stupid bitch when I couldn't pee.

I remember when it was hard for me to go to the bathroom because I had a urinary tract infection.

I remember that I didn't want to eat because I thought it was a dream and didn't matter.

I remember not being able to raise my hand higher than my waist.

I remember not being able to talk.

I remember going for rides in the wheelchair.

I remember my mother brought me a dry erase board for when I could talk to write on.

My hand wouldn't work for some reason.

I remember Anthony coming to visit me one time when the sat me in the hallway in front of the nurses' station.

I remember my mother bringing my CD player to me, and I couldn't pay attention long enough to listen to a song.

I remember crying because I felt like the hours were repeating themselves.

I remember how Minerva always put me in my Mickey mouse outfit.

I remember Jason down in occupational therapy.

I remember how I thought therapy was just there to torture me.

I remember how in occupational therapy Linkin Park came on and I couldn't remember if it was my favorite song.

I remember Emily, Maryana, Megan, Beth, and Eileen coming to visit me on senior skip day.

I remember Emily, Maryana, Eileen, and Julie bringing me Burger King at the same time as Anthony came to visit me during speech therapy.

I remember Anthony came a lot during speech therapy.

I remember I was allowed to visit with him in my room for the first time.

I remember his Godsmack shirt and the new NWA shirt instead of the RPW shirt.

I remember how he tried to break up with me two days before I got out.

I remember on the second to last day there, they let me stand up alone for the first time without supervision.

I remember we left the clock there.

I remember Julie coming to visit me and it felt like I hadn't seen her in 10 years, yet I was sick of her after 10 minutes.

I remember Anthony telling me how worried Adam was.

I remember calling Adam's house and getting Cory and talking to him.

I remember calling Adam's house again, and getting Adam that time.

I remember calling my house and having my sister pickup and be immediately in tears.

I remember rich telling me mommy got a new car that had a 6 CD player.

I remember Stevie and Aunt Katie coming to visit me, and him leaving the Tigger Pez in my room.

I remember getting the get well card signed by every member of the senior class.